My name is Anita, and I am the writer at natiasniche.com. I am obsessed with carbs, podcasts and mini-sized objects! I am the type of girl that will not speak to you even if she's on the verge of dying, but will be the most friendly and solar person you could ever meet once you get to know her. Yes, I am a proud shy and introvert girl! My favorite quote is: "While you throw all your anxieties to Him, because He cares for you." - 1 Peter 5:7
The Smiling Sweetheart
Talks With Anita
You mention in your About Page that you have always been a creative person but never had the courage to express that creativity. How did you eventually find that courage and start your blog, Natia’s Niche?
I’ve spent a lot of time by myself, in my own thoughts and over time I started imagining how my life could possibly turn out. The possibility that I could spend the next 30 years waking up in the morning, 5 or more days a week, doing something that would make everyone else happy except me, was terrifying. Just pondering over the fact that I would have to fit the activities I really believed in and loved around a job to just "pay the bills" not only annoyed me, but also made me so sad. I originally wanted to do a "normal" job because that is what I was told to do. So, I was completely set on the education pathway that the career I was looking at would involve. But, one day I was so overwhelmed by everything around me that I just needed somewhere to release all of that stress. That’s when I started a blog. I was just writing about my feelings and using that platform as a personal dairy. I honestly do not know how, but one thing led to another and I discovered the beautiful world of blogging and started feeling super excited and fluffy inside whenever I thought of writing about what I care about, and making a living and impacting lives at the same time. From there, natiasniche.com was born.
In your opinion, what does being shy and introverted mean? And, can a person be one without the other?
I have written a whole blog post about it because I feel like not many people know the difference and I was one of them in the recent past. When you are introverted, you love being alone, you enjoy spending time with a small group of people or connecting with someone, one on one. You are still able to go to parties, big gatherings and meetings but you can get super exhausted after a long time with many people. You love working stuff out and you can be incredibly creative. You process information before taking action and that is why you can be a great problem solver and leader.
On the other hand, when you are shy you are more anxious about interacting and staying with people. You can be super extroverted and still have anxiety over parties and gatherings. You are scared of being seen and approached by people but sometimes you can crave an interaction so much. You can definitely be an introvert and not shy at all and vice versa. However, I think it can be difficult to find information when you are both shy and introverted and how to deal with it as a woman.
"THERE IS NO PERFECT PERSONALITY TYPE AND FOCUSING ON WHAT YOU CAN DO WILL DIMINISH WHAT YOU CANNOT DO."
How do you take being shy and introverted and make it a character asset?
I genuinely love being a shy and introvert girl, now. I used to feel like a "broken" child when others would just bond so easily with fellow kids. I would feel scared to join in but at the same time, I enjoyed just staying in my own space and doing my own thing. I saw the benefits of being shy and introvert just in the past few months and I cannot believe I was blind about them for so long. For example, because I am an introvert, I am able to listen to people. And, it may seem like a dumb thing to many, but not a lot of people can sit down next to you for half an hour, quietly, and just allow you to vent and know that there is someone that cares about your opinion. Yes, I can say that I can be a great friend. Because, thanks to being an introvert, I am able to listen to you in whatever state of mind you are and give you great advice. As I listen to you, I give what you are saying a lot of thought, which helps me not to jump to conclusions. I think that being shy can give you the motivation to challenge yourself in social situations, which can be a great asset if you know how to do so. You always try to approach people and you may fail the majority of the time, but failure builds far more character than success does.
When people look at and read your blog what do you want them to take away from it?
I want them to feel understood and I want them to say: 'Oh man, that is exactly how I feel!' and realize that it is more than normal to feel lonely or to not enjoy speaking. I came to realize that recently, and I spent way too much time thinking that all humans were just so good at everything, and I was not. So, when I write blog posts, I make sure I am writing about something I believe in or I have gone through. I want my readers to feel empowered and relieved in knowing that being shy and introverted can change their life in a positive way, when they know how to handle it.
You call your readers “Daydreamers”, why is that?
I explained it a bit in my bio page, but in a few words, I was always daydreaming when I was little, and I’ve carried that on till today. Even though some of my dreams may never come true, I push myself forward and I visualize the things that I am trying to achieve and focus on how to differentiate myself. I connect my conscience to the things that I want to achieve and I push myself out of my comfort zone to accomplish my goals. I think that it feels super nice to say to myself: "I always dream about X,Y,Z and today I achieved something close to it!" I can confirm I am not the only one that does that, so I know that if you are shy and introverted and spend a lot of time by yourself, you are most likely a daydreamer as well.
"Do not stop yourself from doing different things just because you are an extrovert or introvert; it is said that you achieve the most when you do something you are not used to!"
Let’s say you see a young girl who is shy and introverted, what is the first word of advice and/or love you’d have for them?
YOU ROCK, GIRL! I can't feel more connected to anyone else than shy girls. If I could spend only 20 minutes with them, I would tell them that it is so normal to feel different; there is no perfect personality type and focusing on what you can do will diminish what you cannot do. If you tried to approach a group of people but you just can’t seem to build the courage to break the ice, who the heck cares! As long as you keep on trying, no one will notice the times when you just could not do it. And, let's be honest, being shy is so cute. So please, enjoy these personality traits that you own, because maybe one day they can go away!
When someone is feeling scared, nervous, or anxious about speaking up about something on a large, or even small, platform, what are some tips you have to help them?
Don't be scared to NOT have everything under control. Seriously, calm down! As long as you know that sharing that information will make you happy and not hurt someone else, you have achieved your goal. You can't change other people's minds, you can't force them to accept you, and you can't stop them from judging you. Please, for your own sake, focus on your input. Make sure you are writing or talking about something you are excited about and the results will come.
What are some tips you have to introverts for who want to stand out in a crowd?
Achieve your goals in silence! This does not mean that you should not get help from people more experienced than you or not listen to friends and family that want your best, but use the time that you spend alone to recharge, to work on your goals. Do not feel like every individual needs to know your biggest aspirations in order to be noticed. Once you achieve your goals for your own benefit, others will notice.
As an introvert, what are your tips and tricks for having confidence?
Train yourself to feel comfortable in your own presence. Do not feel like you are weird or a "loner" just because you enjoy being by yourself. Understand that is not the end of the world if you end up alone in a project or at lunch time. Entertain yourself, be positive and, trust me, others will notice your confidence! There is nothing more puzzling than seeing someone being so comfortable with themselves, and honestly I find those people so intriguing and confident.
Do you believe using labels like introvert/extrovert can help or hinder us when we are forming a relationship or experience?
I think that these labels should be used for personal help. They should be an additional tool to get to know yourself. They should not be used to decide our choices in life. Just because you are an introvert does not mean that you will always have to work by yourself. However, because you know you are an introvert, you realize that you work best by yourself and can help others through the skills you developed when working alone. Can you see the difference? Knowing that you are one or the other should encourage you to find, embrace and utilize in the best of ways the personality traits that you have. Do not stop yourself from doing different things just because you are an extrovert or introvert; it is said that you achieve the most when you do something you are not used to!